A little Self Indulgence

I have a bit of a love hate relationship with scripts. The ability to write long coversations with ease is invaluble but at the same time they do somewhat limit the ability to be descriptive of enviroments and actions. That said I have been mulling over for a while something I read years ago about it being important to create your own characters and make them your own and so my mind turned to how I would design a character in the same vain as horror classica such as Pinhead, Freddy Krueger, Jason Voorhees and the like. Now I’m not comparing my characters to greats like them because I think my invention is as good, just that they are the type of design and style I was looking to replicate.

A man sits at a desk, the only light coming from the computer
glowing computer monitor in front of him, he is naked except
for a pair of boxer shorts and as he scrolls through the list
of videos on the screen he licks his lips. One had controls
the mouse while the other slowly slips from where it had been
resting on his leg and creeps down the front of his shorts.
As a video plays he starts to rub his cock vigorously. On
screen a woman is dragged down a back alley by two men, her
blouse ripped violently off of her body. By the time the
second man gets his turn with the now broken and battered
woman the man at his desk has already spilt his seed and is
lounging on his chair looking satisfied, and glancing around
for tissues.
I trust that was what you wanted.
The man at the computer looks around in fear
Who’s there? How did you get in
A figure steps from the shadows, unnaturally tall and thin it
is dressed in a bizarre black outfit so tight that even in
the dark its ribs can be seen through the material, strangely
pointed and sharp. It’s shoulders are adorned with a ragged
looking cloak and it wears boots up to its knees. On its head
is a cavalier hat complete with silver feather that shimmers
in the dark. The hat is tilted in such a way that the pointed
brim covers the figures eyes.
My name is without importance, it
has long since been lost beneath
the sands of time, as for how I
entered, the door.
(thin, pale lips curl into
a smile beneath the
pointed hat)
I’ve been here all night, I can see
that door and no body has been
through it.
I did not say I used that door, I
used the door. But again, it is of
no importance.
I don’t know who you are or what
drugs you’ve been taking, just get
out of my house now, I’m calling
the police.
Call whoever you want, They won’t
hear you. I won’t allow them to.
Look Just get out, I have a gun in
this desk here and I will use it
(smirking again)
You have no such weapon, nor would
one aid you even if you did. I am
beyond threats from this world
(becoming hysterical)
Look I don’t know what you want but
get out I really will call the
And as I have told you, they will
not hear you. As for what I want, I
have come for you Anthony Rouse
How do you know my name?
How could I not know the name of
the man who called me.
I don’t know you, I have never
called you. You won’t even tell me
who you are.
Your mouth doesn’t need to summon
me, your actions are enough, I hope
that you enjoyed them, they may be
your last for a very long time.
Anthony falls backwards out of his chair and scoots away
across the floor. In response The Cavalier takes a few
delicate paces forwards, carefully placing each foot in front
of the other.
You-you’re here to kill me? Why?
(licks its lips as if
savoring a great taste)
Kill you my dear Anthony?

No, you are not going to die,
though your actions may have
condemned you to a fate you would
consider worse.
Please No!, What have I done to
deserve this? Why would a demon
like you come to me?
What have you done? My dear Anthony
you have just finished signing your
own fate, The ink isn’t even dry on
your hands yet.
The Cavalier turns it’s head towards the door for a moment
before turning back.
(beneath it’s hat there is
a glint of gold from an
amber eye which is hidden
as The Cavalier turns
Beyond that door is a room where a
woman sleeps. A woman you promised
as you were wed to her that you
would love forever and yet as she
sleeps you are in here committing
adultery of the mind and yet you
have the indecency to ask what it
is you have done? And you asked my
identity before, you may have found
a fitting answer as Demon seems
like a fitting way to describe my
Please, Poor Monica, you can’t kill
me, think of her? Where would she
be without me. I provide for her, I
put food on her table…
(Anger rising in its voice
for the first time)
An appeal to consider the innocent?
Where was she on your mind as you
were in here defiling the bond the
two of you signed? How can you lie
there and ask me to think of her
when you never did. Provide for
her? When was the last time you did
anything with her wellbeing in
mind? You call yourself a man when
really there is no chivalry in your

I, who addressed myself as demon am
more a man than you. Those tears
you weep are not for her but for
Please no! There must be people
worse than I am, all I did was
masturbate, there are men out there
cheating all the time, right now
someone is with a whore while his
wife is at home please why me?
Worse than you? Yes there are, but
it is not them to who I appear, but
I can change…
Change Anthony? That is an
admission of guilt. People who
change are people who are wrong.
You have put yourself in a position
you should never have been in
Anthony, This is your own doing.
The Cavalier raises a hand and Anthony rises off the ground.
He starts to twitch and scream as he convulses in the air,
clearly in excruciating pain even though his body shows no
sign of physical damage.
(between screams)
Please no! God in heaven no!
(unleashes a dark laugh so
evil that despite the
mystical space he exists
in manages to wake Monica
in the next room)
A great man once wrote, that There
are more things in heaven and
earth, Horatio, Than are dreamt of
in your philosophy. None of these
things will you see My dear
Anthony. You are going beyond
earth, and with your crimes, you
will never see heaven.
Anthony, still convulsing, drifts across the floor until his
chin rests perfectly in The Cavalier’s outstretched hand.

As soon as their skin touches Anthony’s convulsions stop and
he hangs from The Cavalier’s hand entirely, The Cavalier its
self showing no sign of struggling to hold him.
P…please, a second chance.
You have had a chance Anthony, that
is more than some get. Now come,
there is so much yet for you to
The Cavalier finally lifts its hat, tipping it up with one
delicate finger and showing a ghostly pale face that houses
golden eyes glowing so intently that they seem to bore into
the very soul.
The door opens and Monica steps in, turning on the light she
stares around the empty room. The chair is still on it’s side
on the floor and on the computer screen the second man
finished with the woman as the first pulls a knife to slit
her throat.

Phantom Limbs XVII

Friday 14th September 2116

James Dylan’s Audio Diary

What have I done? The last thing I remember is seeing the bar as I walked down the street. The bar and the bang. What have I done? Where did I get the gun? I was just. I wanted to try and…why did I go in? Why did I order that drink? And now…Phil. The poor man didn’t deserve any of this. His house. It was so sparse. There were bottles strewn about the place. He was as drunk as I was. But he had more sense than I did. He tried to run. Cried for help. He didn’t listed to me. To my mad, drunken ramblings and I go angry. Why couldn’t he just listen? No…I can’t blame him. This is all my fault. What have I done? Now I’m just sat in this house. Alone again. With blood on  my hands. What happened to me? This is a new nightmare. My child is gone. My wife. Phil…they’re all gone. And it’s all my fault. I pushed them away. I pulled the trigger. The police will be after me now. It’s only a matter of time.

What can I do? Or is it too late for everything? Is there anything I can do to make up for the evil I have done? The computer. The automated bank. Maybe one last thing I can do…for Mily…thank god Joanna always insisted on separate bank accounts. There isn’t enough money there to buy Mily that present she wanted. Maybe her grandmother  and mother can scrape the rest together between them. Maybe after everything I can still afford to give her that little house she wanted. Got to move fast. I can hear something moving outside the door. Am I still drunk? No. It’s got to be one of those police hounds. Those mechanical hounds, more machine than I am. But less cold… there. My last deed done. They are definitely outside the house. I can hear it snuffling beneath he door. I guess this is it. Joanna.. Oh Mily. I am so sorry…

James Dylan logged out.

Phantom Limbs XVI

Thursday 13th September 2116

James Dylan’s Audio diary

You know what? What the fuck was I talking about? My fault. How is any of this my fault? My life has been going to fucking hell and I’m sat here crying like a baby because everyone else has fucked everything up for me. Did I ask to me maimed? Did I ask for my bitch of a wife to leave me? Did I not try and explain the horrors I was going through? Did she care? No no no fucking no. What the fuck did I do to deserve this? It’s her fault, and Apex for fitting me with this faulty shit augment! And Phil’s! Yea that fuck started all this. Clumsy drunken arsehole! What the fuck was wrong with him1 getting drunk and then moving that machinery. He should be fired, he should be in jail for what he did. Oh fuck off! Now the anti-auaugment bitch barmaid is giving me the evils. What the fuck does she want? Just because I’m different? Because I’m superior! Well my life is hell bitch! Oh what does this gorilla doorman what?

Now look at me. Lying in the fucking street, people looking at me like I’m some fucking drunk. I’m not drunk! That fucking anti-aug bar. Just hates machine people. Well fuck them. Fuck them all. How did I end up like this? Fucking Phil. Yea…fucking Phil. How about I go and pay fucking Phil a fucking visit. I know where he lives. He can pay me back…for all this misery he has caused. He can pay me back. And explain to my wife. And my child…and to me. Yea…lets go pay Phil a visit.

James Dylan logged out.

Phantom Limbs XV

Gonna try to rapidly get the last few chapters of this story out in the hour I have left before I head to Japan for a month so be ready for a few quick uploads. hopefully the quality won’t tank to hard and i will pretty it all up when I get back.

Thursday 13th September 2116

James Dylan’s Audio Diary

She left me…I think she’s left me. Joanna found out about the upgrade I bought.and then she started shouting. I’m in such a daze, I can hardly remember what she was saying. And then she took Mily, she took her and shouted something about her mother and then she left. Poor Mily was in tears. Her little face was balled up, she was confused. She was afraid. It was like looking into the face I saw so often in my dreams that it’s almost burned into my mind. Now I’m just sat, in this empty house…I don’t know what to do. Where did my life go wrong? I…I’m not even sure I can speak right now.

I know I did wrong here. I know that it is my fault. I should never have gotten the upgrade, never gone to the store but…nobody can understand the trauma! The dreams were nightmares, the sleepless nights. The bins piled high with packs of used 5 hour energy tablets. What was I to do? I needed something to help and, somehow something about getting the implants. It just spoke to me. Every upgrade seemed to help.they silenced the dreams, made the pain go away. Made me a better man at work. Every bit of machinery inside me has made me a better person but each piece has pushed someone else away from me. My family…my coworkers. And now I am the best at my job, I can sleep easy and I am sat alone in my empty house. I can’t stay here. I need to go get some fresh air.

James Dylan logged out.

Phantom Limbs XIV

Well this is the first post in ages. work has really been dragging my morale down and made it hard to get the drive to write but hopefully ic an get back on the waggon and finish this before i go on holiday for a month.


Wednesday 12th September 2116

James Dylan’s Audio Diary

Well here I am again, back in the bar. If there is one good thing to say it’s that the dreams are gone. The good ones and the bad. When I go to sleep I pretty much just shut off, when I wake up it is like no time has passed at all, it’s justs suddenly day. I can’t say I am overly thrilled about that but if it keeps those horrific nightmares away I would have done anything. That brings me back to what I have done. Joanna doesn’t know about the arm upgrade yet. I’m an idiot but I was smart enough to get the same coverings put back on so my arm doesn’t look any different. Still, it feels like she knows. She hardly looks at me anymore. I’m starting to feel my old self again and she just seems to be falling back further away from me. After my first nights sleep when I woke feeling fully rested I tried to give her a hug and she pulled away from me. In 11 years of marriage she has never refused a hug even if she has been busy. I feel like somehow this process of recovering has effected her so badly. All the time I thought it might have been me changing, that somehow it was my fault things were falling apart. What if actually it was her that was changing. All this time I was angry at her but she couldn’t help it, she’s been affected more deeply by this than she can let on, trying to be strong for Mily. I feel like such am imbecile that I didn’t see it before. I need to get home and show her how I can be strong now for all of us, she doesn’t need to anymore.

Work is even starting to progress along again. This upgrade is great. I was never a great typer before, hence all the audio diaries I guess. But now it’s like I hardly need to even be looking at the screen and I can be editing reports and everything else I need to do. This upgrade was a great idea, I’ll be moving up the ladder at rocket speed before long. The old colleagues are still being bitter about everything. They haven’t invited me out recently. Hardly even look at me to tell you the truth. So childish. And after they were so supportive when they thought I was a cripple. Though I guess they showed as much sympathy to Phil as well and nothing was wrong with him. Speaking of I now know Phil is back on the bottle. Poor sod, I would almost feel sympathy but it could be a problem in the company. Can’t have drunks about, we already know they can cause accidents. Anyway, time to go be strong for the family. One more quick drink and then back home we go. I am starting to think that everything might turn out alright.

James Dylan logged out.

Phantom Limbs XIII

Luck part 13…


Sunday 9th September 2116

James Dylan’s audio Diary

Another morning waking up in a hospital bed, another new surgery, more new machinery added to me. I’ve made a huge mistake. I couldn’t help myself, I was on edge. And I’ve always been one that can be talked into compulsive purchases. I bought the arm upgrade. They installed it and the update at the same time, I can’t even change my mind. It’s too late. It’s built into me. What am I going to do? I needed that money. Now how can I afford to buy Mily that gift for her birthday? That play house. She wanted it so badly. I can seen her disappointed little face when I close my eyes now. It’s worse than the dreams could ever be. What have I done? And Joanna, she’ll be furious, there is no hiding what I’ve done. How can I? If there was an award for worst father of the year than it would be me. Why couldn’t Joanna have come with me? Why did she need to be so self righteous? She could have stopped me, why didn’t she take my credit ships off me? She was always going on about how she was the smarter one with money. God damn her, she always has to be so right and now she’s going to laud this over me when she did nothing to stop it happening, if she had just listened to me for once. Worst of all I can’t even go get a drink to try and calm my nerves. I can’t drink for a few days while I am taking the medication to help they systems adapt better to me. Why should I need to drink though? Why would a man ever be afraid to go back to his own home. And I bet I won’t get any sympathy from her. I’m the victim here, I’m the cripple. She’ll forget that though, forget or ignore it like my damn colleagues. Anyway better cut this short, doctor is coming.

James Dylan logged out.